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recordings & lyrics by Peter D'Elia

by Peter D'Elia

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1.
i thought the ukulele was just a silly toy but santa came to show me that i'm a silly boy now I play ukulele every night and every day and i want the world to play a little ukulelele i can fit it in my backpack or hang it from my neck and when i'm in the mountains i play it while i treck i play it for the wildlife i meet along the way 'cause i want them all to play a little ukulelele a little uku uku uku uku le le le le le le le le when i feel like trouble follows me around i sing a little story and strum a little sound all my little troubles are likely here to stay so please don't take away my little ukulelele it's like a little geetar with just the four high strings always nice to have if you're the kind that always sings or give one to a bully who has nothing nice to say 'cause they all just need to play a little ukulelele a little uku uku uku uku le le le le le le le le when i feel like trouble follows me around i sing a little story and strum a little sound all my little troubles are likely here to stay so please don't take away my little ukulelele
2.
maybe you feel life is no deal find a new land, join a rock band living the dream is a regime we have our way, come spend a day at the ausländerbehörde just take a number and queue come to the ausländerbehörde we make life murder for you we must approve of your big move so we insist on a long list papers to bring to our meeting proof that you state to integrate to the ausländerbehörde just take a number and queue come to the ausländerbehörde we make life murder for you here you will learn what you must earn work must be stable, over the table with an employer and a good lawyer and insurance you have a chance at the ausländerbehörde just take a number and queue come to the ausländerbehörde we make life murder for you after you wait we will debate we will decide if you reside papers you lack mean you come back you can bring food and your good mood to the ausländerbehörde just take a number and queue one two three ausländerbehörde we make life murder for you maybe you find you change your mind too complicated and overrated go back to mum where you came from next time you roam you have a home at the ausländerbehörde just take a number and queue eins zwei drei ausländerbehörde we make life murder for you a, u, s, l, ä, n, d, e, r, b, e, h, ö, r, d, e that's how we spell foreign authority
3.
australia is distinct nothing is extinct they've got it all beware if you go out of reptiles all about insects and animals always look for danger think like a bush ranger if you want to survive identify each creature know each and every feature or you won't go home alive watch out if you go out in australia you get no protection your mobile phone gets no reception hold your laughter it's you they're after you'll only have yourself to blame you'll be lucky to return only in pain the people are so warm they seem to mean no harm they've got it down to an art they get inside your head then get you into bed and steal your heart if you want to integrate you must appreciate rugby and cricket know all the native sounds and learn how to pronounce "cunt" and "get fucked" watch out if you go out in australia you'd better use protection or they'll plant the seed of deception hold your laughter it's you they're after you'll only have yourself to blame you'll be lucky to return only in pain get fucked
4.
australia es distinto nada está extinto hay de todo cuidado cuando sales hay reptiles, animales e insectos es muy peligroso y mas horroroso que tus pesadillas hay que identificarlos y luego, evitarlos para salvar tu vida cuidado donde vayas en australia no tendrás ayuda tu móvil no tiene cobertura la historia de australia no es ficción, ni es humor tendrás suerte si vuelves solo con dolor la gente es amable y tan adorable es un truco te dan mucha cerveza confunden tu cabeza y tu corazón si te quieres integrar hay que dominar rugby y cricket si te quieres comunicar siempre tienes que gritar "cunt!" y "get fucked!" cuidado donde vayas en australia no tendrás ayuda tu móvil no tiene cobertura la historia de australia no es ficción, ni es humor tendrás suerte si vuelves solo con dolor
5.
i never wanna have a ball and chain i hear the story time and time again they pour you in a bowl and eat up your soul and the rest they pour down the drain i'm never gonna say "i do" they don't say what you're signing up to it all starts fun but once the wedding's done she wants the sperm from you then there's the mother-in-law who can't wait to be grandma she's shopping for cribs crocheting bibs and preaching her blah blah blah soon there's babies everywhere crying and puking in your hair your wife is acting hyper 'cause you cannot change a diaper and grandma smells like underwear next you're working like a fool trying to put the kids through school but they take your car keys drive your car through some trees and park it in a swimming pool but you keep paying for it all while grandma moves in down the hall and you've got no defense and no help from your friends you don't even get your one phone call so that's about it until you die and if you're wondering why my song is so long well, my feelings are strong it's a message from a happy single guy and why i never wanna have a ball and chain i hear the story time and time again they pour you in a bowl and eat up your soul and the rest they pour down the drain yes the rest they pour down the drain no you don't even own your own brain i'd rather move in with the insane
6.
people try to say there's a way you should live tell them that you quit, not a shit should you give people have a need to be seen like they're tough show them you don't care, all they wear is their fluff go your way when they tell you to obey make your bed with someone else instead it's okay to leave the war they play feed your head fight the doom and the dread if you want to run, then run what's the point of waiting when the rule is said and done no one can control you if the role you play is deaf raise your middle finger bite your lip like an f people try to claim that the blame is on you turn away and walk from their talk and their view people need to gain like a vein that they feed still they only crave like a slave to their greed
7.
i sit on the floor and look up at my man i whine at him all day, but he don't understand i don't like canned food or food in a bag my man just ignores me no matter how hard i wag my man he treats me like i'm paying for a crime i could sit and whine at him all day, but my man pays me no mind i walk to the table and sit at his feet i give him those eyes so he'll give me some meat he acts like a blind man, like he's got special needs if i was a seeing-eye dog i'd always get my feed my man he treats me like he lives all alone he eats up all the red meat, he don't even throw me a bone i gave him a rabbit, i gave him a squirrel i'm always a good dog 'round the next door girl i don't do doo-doos on the front lawn i don't hump the post lady when my man is gone my man he treats me like i'm here for free rent i'll be the first thing on his mind when his last dollar is spent i walked into a bar, my man was having a drink and telling that joke about a dog walking into a bar, i think i said, "that's still not funny and why are you looking at me funny? you never knew i could talk 'cause you don't talk to me, dummy" my man he treats me like all he needs is booze and smokes i guess it's like they say, you can't teach an old man new jokes
8.
braidwood 03:55
something died in braidwood as i was walking through sure was not no wombat, sure was not no roo i could tell from looks i got from folks in braidwood town her love for me is what had died and she was not around braidwood, whatcha do, did you scare my love away? i could have come back to a home to share with her someday did she mention why she left or maybe where she'd gone? you could have told her something to keep her hanging on i walked into the op shop, i walked into the post i walked into the braidwood pub, places she liked most everyone just looked at me and then they looked away i asked them if they'd seen my love, they wouldn't even say braidwood, whatcha do, did you let my love go free? you threw away my one last hope for a future family did you give her my last message, did you tell her what i said? i wanted to explain myself, but she'd already gone to bed i'm still here in braidwood with nothing much to do sometimes at the braidwood pub i see folks i once knew i put up a wanted sign with my love's photo there if you see her, there's a reward if you tell me where braidwood, whatcha do, did you meddle with my life? are you so lonely you can't let me settle with a wife? i will still forgive you 'til i reach that happy end we will stick together, braidwood, we're each other's friend
9.
butts 00:03
a cutie little booty make my rap absurd i see a tiny hiney and i fuck up the words i been rappin ever since my mom could crawl but i pass a little ass and i can't rap at all butts are fillin' up my mind butts are killin' all my rhymes my mojo don't work, my rap got no flow there ain't room for both so one's got to go butts, butts i was always rappin' in my downtown cage 'til i got a chance to hit the uptown stage when the moment came for me to rock the mic all the booty shake and my brain take a hike butts are fillin' up my mind butts are killin' all my rhymes my mojo don't work, my rap got no flow there ain't room for both so one's got to go butts, butts if you think that rappin' is a piece of cake try to wrap a rap around a booty shake all the booty knockin' up inside my head knock me out until i gotta go to bed butts are fillin' up my mind butts are killin' all my rhymes my mojo don't work, my rap got no flow there ain't room for both so one's got to go butts, butts
10.
long ago as wanna be mavericks trying to light our little matches artwork and music blended words meant more than the singer intended we prayed for the day we were let in the club to cherish the sacred ticket stub time flew so much faster once in the rye, now the catcher we're still chasing after clowns who never lost their laughter through the years we learned the secrets learned the chords, learned the sequence hard work and friendship married love weighed more than the gear we carried we held on tight 'til the dream came true and time would tell what the future knew time flew so much faster once in the rye, now the catcher we're still chasing after clowns who never lost their laughter after all it doesn't matter if we get rich or just get fatter inside some minor changes the major theme just rearranges we fish for the ones who can take the joke and laugh 'til we go up in smoke time flew so much faster once in the rye, now the catcher we're still chasing after clowns who never lost their laughter
11.
cows 00:03
12.
dear guitar 04:41
sand on a shore reminds me more and more of the times i was picking on a beach everything i played was fresh, homemade songs drifted in my front door but now when i pick this old dried-up stick it doesn't seem to have much to say something's gone wrong there's no sign of a song it's best at picking dust off the floor dear guitar my old friend let's not let this be the end we have barely played the heart strings of our love i know it's been quite a while since we made each other smile you will always be the friend i'm thinking of sun on the wood made it play so good like the wildlife was coming to a show singing to the trees picking with the ease of a train that cannot stop when it should but now i just wait my train is still late i don't even know if it still runs somewhere down the track i hope that it comes back that happy little train that always could dear guitar my old friend let's not let this be the end we have barely played the heart strings of our love i know it's been quite a while since we made each other smile you will always be the friend i'm thinking of
13.
flashback 00:03
rewind to the time when i was small back when i couldn't even crawl just a round ten-pound sponge on the hunt for my next lunch ten years flew by like tiny birds playing games and learning words music lessons after school flashback memories that made it to the middle of my brain keep coming back flashback moments that were made to remain and to never go black and then again two times ten making noise and pushing a pen homework left me in the shade music always made the grade thirties sent me way out west golden gates made my new nest working just to pay the dues feeding fire to the muse flashback memories that made it to the middle of my brain keep coming back flashback moments that were made to remain and to never go black forties flew me overseas a multinational swarm of bees driving hard and selling songs back to bed before the dawn flashback memories that made it to the middle of my brain keep coming back flashback moments that were made to remain and to never go black
14.
foam 02:36
i want foam in a glass of beer i want foam so give it here if you're the tender of the bar i'm at just gimme foam, thick and fat foam - that's all i ask foam - and make it fast foam - drippin' down the glass pass me the gas 'til i'm up to my ass in foam is the part of beer i love don't let it settle, let it rise above i don't wanna hear that the gas is dead gimme the foam and off with your head foam - that's all i ask foam - and make it fast foam - drippin' down the glass pass me the gas 'til i'm up to my ass in foam, foam, foam, foam foam makes so many people complain i see bartenders pour foam down the drain some people stare at foam 'til it's gone take all my money, i'll drink it 'til dawn foam - that's all i ask foam - and make it fast foam - drippin' down the glass pass me the gas 'til i'm up to my ass in foam, foam, foam, foam f is for fools who cry and complain o is for oh that's right, you have no brain a is for assholes who bitch about foam m is for mama who's waiting at home foam - that's all i ask foam - and make it fast foam - drippin' down the glass pass me the gas 'til i'm up to my ass in foam - that's all i ask foam - and make it fast foam - drippin' down the glass pass me the gas 'til i'm up to my ass (talkin', Bier vom Fass) in foam
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17.
grin 00:03
sometimes i sit and grin i think about the shit i'm in but then i think again the shit i'm in is not as shitty as the shit where others have been that's why i grin when i told my dog to stay he never ever would obey and then he ran away it didn't matter when i heard that san francisco fell in the bay i felt okay i asked a girl to be my bride but she just threw my ring aside and i just cried and cried but then some major war began and no one knew which leader had lied everyone died sometimes i just can't win i think about the shit i'm in but then i think again the shit i'm in is not as shitty as the shit where others have been and then i grin i had a party, no one came i had nobody i could claim and no one knew my name but lots of people think that if they blow themselves up they will find fame then they find flame if you think you don't belong like you've been dealt the cards all wrong there's reason to be strong if you're just the one guy in the orchestra who plays the gong you end the song
18.
grow 02:34
grow every seed we sow like birds and bees when they say hello grow grow grow but i need to know how plants and trees grow up from below grow grow g is for garden and green plants that grow guess how we get all the great food we know sunlight and water and good ground below gifts from a garden are what make us go g is for grow or we say germinate when a seed sprouts after two flowers mate good care is given and then we just wait we grow like grass from the food we create grow every seed we sow like birds and bees when they say hello grow grow grow but i need to know how plants and trees grow up from below grow grow grow grow grow grow g is for great and how grateful we feel reaping a harvest of food that is real seeding and weeding and eating our meal gardening cycles and turns like a wheel grow every seed we sow like birds and bees when they say hello grow grow grow but i need to know how plants and trees grow up from below grow grow grow grow grow grow grow grow grow
19.
i'm a bird, i can fly you are jealous and i understand why i'm a fish, i can swim try to catch me, but your chances are slim i'm a dog, i can bark you will fear me when you hear me in the dark i'm a cat in a tree don't you wish your girlfriend could climb like me? here is where i tower here is how you cower here is where i break you here is how i take you i'm a bee, i can sting bother me and you know what that will bring i'm a snake, i can slide try to find me when i slither and hide i'm a horse, i can run try to ride me and you'll see who has the fun i'm a bear in a cave try to own me and i'll send you to your grave here is where i tower here is how you cower here is where i break you here is how i take you
20.
hiding place 02:58
21.
hit writer 03:04
spending my life sitting around looking at the clock, staring at the ground squinting at the signs at the side of the road thinking about the times they said stop and they said go all of the hours, all of the days time i could have spent in different ways then the moment came when the thought came along all of that time i could have written a song now when i sit and i sit and i sit my brain starts to think until it writes me a hit i don't have to drive or move anymore i just get up to get the check at my door you can be glad if you have time to think most people live like they're dying to blink sitting around might be just the right thing open your mouth and see what you sing hit writer - in one afternoon hit writer - just a rhyme and a tune hit writer - writing on into the night hit writer - repeat after me hit writer - on the one and the three hit writer - write until you hit it right
22.
mixing up a fact with a fake might be our very biggest mistake one more careless slip-up we cannot afford we come to a split in the road where everyone's opinions explode regulating systems with one accord how high we climb, how high we climb, how high we climb and don't know where we're heading how high we climb, how high we climb, how high we climb to fall down again and it gets under my skin trusting in the people who lead we bargain with the love that we need love can save a life at the end of the day they say that the hurting will end but nobody is certain when we can wash our hands of the choices we made how high we climb, how high we climb, how high we climb and don't know where we're heading how high we climb, how high we climb, how high we climb to fall down again and it gets under my skin waiting for a change more or less everyone gets sick of the stress maybe we should just throw away the tv the doctors and the teachers know best but no one knows who wrote the tests and no one can be sure if the cure is soon to be how high we climb, how high we climb, how high we climb and don't know where we're heading how high we climb, how high we climb, how high we climb to fall down again and it gets under my skin how high we climb, how high we climb, how high we climb how high we climb
23.
i don't like christmas so don't sing to me singing can't help the world make harmony most people can't even sing right in key what they call christmas sounds like misery carolers came to my door with their cheer singing like they weren't able to hear hurts like a worm eating into my ear i'll set a trap for them same time next year singing is not what we're needing more of making more noise is like making bad love "do you hear what i hear?" ringing above i'll cut my ears off if push comes to shove who are these christmas-folk singing about? jesus and angels and some guy named claus "peace upon earth" they keep shouting out loud if i want peace then i can't leave the house think of your neighbors if you can't sing well i'll make the next guy eat his jingle bells angels on high singing "the first noël" if they come down they can go straight to hell
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25.
if you and i are a song then i'm getting all the words wrong i keep trying to make it rhyme hoping you'll join in sometime you could fool me easily humming some dumb melody i would think our song's a hit but would you remember it? so i sing the song to you and you hum along with me sometimes we don't seem to find a harmony but then we meet each other's eyes and i can see you realize i'd play this song all day if you wanted me to if you and i are a game then our rules are not at all the same i keep playing nice and slow you beat me twice in a row but i keep on swinging away just in case i hit someday would it mean i'd have a chance to make a move and to advance? so i hit the ball to you and you hit the ball to me sometimes you slam it when i hit it nicely but then we meet each other's eyes and i can see you realize i'd play this game all day if you wanted me to if you and i are a road then we're moving a fragile load i could go or i could stay you only seem to move one way somewhere between hope and doubt spinning in a round-about could it mean i'll never know where this road could ever go? so i show the way to you and you show the way to me sometimes i wonder if it still will someway be but then we meet each other's eyes and i can see you realize i'd stay this way all day if you wanted me to
26.
are you ready? i have something to tell you in case you haven't picked up on my clues if you could read my mind you'd see in every line my heart is inside out like front page news are you ready? i have something to tell you such heartfelt words i've never said before i'll keep them clear and brief i wear them on my sleeve i see no reason why i should say more it would take most of my life to tell you what my dreams can see and take up all the rest to tell you what they mean to me are you ready? i have something to tell you and it's high time since everyone already knows i need no symphony i wrote some poetry and you're standing right here so here goes i love you i love you i, l, o, v, e, y, o, u if it's flowers you want, it's the flower shop you get if you want loving memories, i won't forget to show you now and always, even on sundays
27.
it's okay 00:03
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little eyes 03:57
one two three little sheep bring you to sleepy land four five six little fish tell you your future seven eight nine little swine dance with you hand in hand ten by ten little men kill the big monster so close your little eyes, the world is inside your mind a foot can be a mile and color can turn black and white outside the cold wind can blow your dreams away inside it's safe and warm, your dreams will be sure as the day your dreams will be sure as the day ten nine eight little maids feed little boys and girls seven six five little eyes are closing with you four three two little shoes walk you to dream world one by one, little sun, all your dreams will come true so close your little eyes, the world is inside your mind a foot can be a mile and color can turn black and white the world is so big outside, there's no need to be afraid just close your eyes and see your dreams at the light of the day your dreams at the light of the day your dreams at the light of the day your dreams at the light of the day
30.
lock jah 00:03
you know from the very first hit you never ever gonna wanna quit rastaman got a hold on you grip so tight make your lips turn blue lock jah - love at first bite lock jah - smoking day and night lock jah - never been so right nothing could be tighter than almighty lock jah you will learn to pack a bowl pretty soon you learn to roll fat at the end and thin at the point too good to pass so you bogart that joint lock jah - love at first bite lock jah - smoking day and night lock jah - never been so right nothing could be tighter than almighty lock jah you can make a water pipe or use an apple (not too ripe) you may think you get more high when you cough you will do anything just to get off lock jah - love at first bite lock jah - smoking day and night lock jah - never been so right nothing could be tighter than almighty lock jah some say all they need is more cash like magic all the green turn into hash rastaman come to town again you can bet he will be your best friend lock jah - love at first bite lock jah - smoking day and night lock jah - never been so right nothing could be tighter than almighty lock jah a big inhalation all across the nation lock jah rastafari
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mary jane 04:23
early in the morning at the light of dawn her heavenly vision standing on my lawn she had the scent of a holy flower and she said, "boy, come light my fire" sweet was the burn from her sweet ground my world was turned upside down my wedding day, my loving wife my mary jane, she saved my life early in the morning, late in the evening she's the reason, she keeps me breathing she's my fire when i'm freezing burning higher, higher and higher, mary jane who could know love could grow mary jane sweet and kine, now she's mine, mary jane jane jane who could know love could grow mary jane sweet and kine, now she's mine, mary jane jane jane now all is right what once was wrong my kite is high, my wind is strong sure as the sun, sure as the rain my love will grow like mary jane sure as the sun, sure as the rain my love will grow like mary jane early in the morning, late in the evening she's the reason, keeps me breathing she's my fire when i'm freezing burning higher, higher and higher early in the morning, late in the evening she's the reason, keeps me breathing she's my fire when i'm freezing burning higher, higher and higher, mary jane
33.
mine 03:10
i asked my mommy for salami in my lunch today but then you tried to take my sandwich when i looked away it's not my fault if you don't get salami in your lunch i'll stare at you at make you watch me munch and munch and munch my lunch is mine, mine and if you whine, fine i'll kick you and i'll shove you 'cause your mommy doesn't love you and it's mine, mine there is no fine line you should be on a diet 'cause you got a big behind you asked your daddy if you could go out with me to play and he said yes, but clean your mess and put your toys away so then you had no toys to play with when we were outdoors it's your own fault so give mine back to me 'cause they're not yours my toys are mine, mine and if you whine, fine i'll pull your hair and slap you and i'll scratch you if i have to but they're mine, mine it takes no einstein i told you you could play with me but now you crossed the line i asked you over to my house so we could watch tv but then you started asking me to watch your dvd i wouldn't ask you over if i thought you would complain i'll tie you up and make you watch me eat my lunch again my tv's mine, mine and if you whine, fine i'm gonna educate you 'cause your mom and daddy hate you 'cause it's mine, mine and no means nein, du schwein i'm sick of it so stick it where the sun will never shine you told the teacher you were gonna color in your book and you think i don't know that those were all my pens you took so just like with my lunch and with my toys and my tv the teacher's gonna teach you not to take my pens from me my pens are mine, mine and if you whine, fine i'll poke you with a pencil and i'll stab you with a stencil 'cause they're mine, mine so stop your lying and crying i'm not your friend and you can't even draw inside the lines
34.
there goes missy may always trying to run away taking from the till flying like a whip-poor-will missy may and pistol pete missy may and pistol pete fall fall falling rain wash away the weather vane north south east west running like a wild guess missy may and pistol pete missy may and pistol pete there goes pistol pete always trying to trick or treat broke so many hearts falling like a house of cards missy may and pistol pete missy may and pistol pete smoke smoke smoking gun pistol pointed at the sun missy's on the plains love is like a hurricane missy may and pistol pete missy may and pistol pete
35.
there's a pretty girl who plays guitar she likes to sing at the local bar i go in there, i sit and drink but not for the reason that you might think i told her she should play there more she said "i've seen you here alone before" i told her "i am not alone my banjo doesn't like to stay at home" my banjo has a crush on your guitar that's why i'm drinking in this bar i can tell the way it picks my five-string wants to meet your six i asked her if she'd like to jam she said "it's late, i have to catch the tram" i said "could we play sometime soon?" she said "i'm sorry, i don't know that tune" so then she said "now listen dear you and your friend should have a beer" i said "i think we missed last call and my banjo doesn't drink at all" my banjo has a crush on your guitar that's why i'm drinking in this bar they could learn each other's licks my five-string wants to meet your six so guitar girl, she rolled her eyes and said "right, have a good night, guys" but then she made a frightened face my banjo rose out of its case the bar door shut all by itself glasses fell down off the shelf "the fun you made of me" i said has made my banjo very mad" my banjo has a crush on your guitar that's why i'm drinking in this bar it knows all of your lyrics my five-string wants to meet your six so she and i were trapped inside she cried for help so i replied "my banjo's fair, it doesn't bite it plays 'dueling banjos' all night" then her guitar began to play she and i both backed away she said "can we get out of here?" i said "my place is very near" my banjo has a crush on your guitar that's why i'm drinking in this bar it thinks they'd make the perfect mix my five-string wants to meet your six
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no clothes 03:48
come on everybody it's naked time leave your clothes on the clothing line somebody decided that it's a crime to show your skin - no! - let it shine come on everybody let's all undress we feel more free when we wear more less it's more than just a right to express we just feel right in the nude i guess no clothes - they just get in the way no clothes - the way we should dress every day no clothes - come and get close to me no clothes - and take off that accessory adam and eve knew how to begin they had no clothes, they only had skin somebody decided that's original sin but skin is the thing we were all born in no clothes - they just get in the way no clothes - the way we should dress every day no clothes - come and get close to me no clothes - and take off that accessory some people say that culture is crude when others decide to dress in the nude we know from eve when she bit the fruit that we're best dressed in our birthday suits no clothes - they just get in the way no clothes - the way we should dress every day no clothes - come and get close to me no clothes - and take off that accessory
38.
no pasa nada 00:03
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número uno 00:03
it's hard to impress anyone anymore and hard to express something not said before but you only have to know número uno the number one someone who you're writing for if you think that you've got something to say or something to play in a musical way just start to write, there's no right and no wrong you could write a song about writing a song you don't need to think that it needs to be deep you can dream up a song when you're deep in your sleep you don't need to think that you need to show off showing yourself is showing enough it's hard to impress anyone anymore and hard to express something not said before but you only have to know número uno the number one someone who you're writing for it could all be made up or entirely true just so it comes from the inside of you trying too hard is a hard way to go but something will come from the hard work you show writing is fun and it's all because there's only one thing to be sure that one does just be yourself, only you play that part everything comes from your head and your heart it's hard to impress anyone anymore and hard to express something not said before but you only have to know número uno the number one someone who you're writing for to know what you feel and what you're feeling for writing leads to writing leads to writing more
40.
pain hurts 02:25
you were doing homework in the morning in the kitchen while you spread the butter on your toast and ate it while you stapled all your papers but the butter on your fingers and the stapler made the stapler slip and staple through your finger tip and that is when it hurts bloody butter dripping and you're stapled to your homework and it hurts you can keep on trying but you're always close to dying pain hurts you were riding on your bike and getting close to school but when you got up to an intersection you were looking at a pretty student who was walking so you did not see the teacher driving right in front of you and you flew off your bike and that is when it hurts flying off your bike and then run over by the teacher and it hurts you can keep on trying but you're always close to dying pain hurts you were laying on a stretcher staring at the ceiling when the doctor said that you would have to stay there for a month and so you got up just to use the toilet but you did not know there was a tube inside your arm and you cut off your blood and that is when it hurts cutting off your blood supply and dying in a stretcher and it hurts you can keep on trying but you're always close to dying pain hurts you were dead and angels would not let you into heaven so the devil let you into hell to work for him by digging in the ashes that were burning and your contract was forever but forever is too long and so i have to end this song now and it hurts
41.
riddler ed 03:24
this is the story of riddler ed riddler ed riddled with everything he said ask him for an answer, he'd riddle you instead, i read but riddler ed knows he's a clown one day his mother asked riddler ed why is it so hard to wake you from your bed? is a man awake if he rises from the dead?, ed said but riddler ed knows he's a clown riddler ed knows he's a clown one day a girl asked riddler ed will one day you and i be wed? is it still a flower if all its seeds have fled?, ed said but riddler ed knows he's a clown riddler ed knows he's a clown even riddler ed's red nose knows he's a clown have you asked riddler ed? is he just someone you made up in your head? have you asked riddler ed? is he just something you hide back in your shed? have you asked riddler ed? is this the path you think you should have led? one day the priest asked riddler ed will you partake of the wine and the bread? am I still somebody if all my body's bled?, ed said but riddler ed knows he's a clown riddler ed knows he's a clown one day the town asked riddler ed what are your last words before we hang your head? have you asked yourselves who's still hanging by a thread?, ed said but riddler ed knows he's a clown riddler ed knows he's a clown even riddler ed's red nose knows he's a clown have you asked riddler ed? is he just someone you made up in your head? have you asked riddler ed? is he just something you hide back in your shed? have you asked riddler ed? is this the path you think you should have led?
42.
she always finds a way to find you every day she calls you at your home or on your mobile phone she reaches you online just to say the weather's fine any poor excuse just to give you more abuse wherever you go she'll find you she's the fly on your food, the stone in your shoe she's like santa claus or the world wide web she knows when you wake up and when you go to bed how many ways have you tried to give her the message that she won't be your bride without a trace she no comprende inglés she stares at you like her head has nothing inside once you realize that she's stalking you'll be blocking all her calls but there's so many ways to be found these days so she's got you by the balls she shows up at a bar where she knows you are and casts her evil glare at other women there she has her mind set that you're playing hard to get little does she know you would rather kiss her bro wherever you go she'll find you she's the fly on your food, the stone in your shoe she's like the nsa or the irs there's no point in hiding 'cause she's got your address how many ways have you tried to give her the message that she won't be your bride without a trace she no comprende inglés she stares at you like her head has nothing inside you know that she'll find you 'cause there's nowhere to hide you could only get away if somehow she died
43.
sidewinder 00:03
44.
single guy 00:03
i'm single guy, single guy i don't have a girlfriend, please don't ask me why i'm single guy, single guy i never get the last piece of the pie i go into a bar and take a look around hoping that the girls don't smell that i'm a hound i walk up to a miss and ask her how she is the only thing she says is "good. bye." that's why i'm single guy, single guy women get a notion not to let me catch their eye i'm single guy, single guy i love fishing, but i always go home dry one time i met a girl and i thought i made the cut she talked to me all night until the bar was shut so then i told the chick "don't run away too quick" she said "i'm not, my boyfriend worked the bar all night" i'm single guy, single guy i always score a zero and that's my all-time high i'm single guy, single guy if charm could kill, i couldn't kill a fly one time a woman said "please come to my bed" i figured there was only one way that line could be read she brought me to her room and handed me a broom "there's a spider in my sheets!" was why i'm still single guy, single guy i'd be mister right, but i'm wrong each time i try i'm single guy, single guy my mother's even helping me, i wish that was a lie
45.
sola 00:03
(lyrics co-written by andrea pérez bejarano) sola todo a tu manera, sin tenerme presente solo mi ilusión siempre tu canción me dejaste cantando sola sola nada huele igual en la habitación aún no me dijiste que cambió, por qué te fuiste me despierto confundida, sola sola noches eternas, mirada vacía repito en mi pensamiento has empezado otro cuento? mi papel es quedarme sola
46.
sometimes we like someone and we like them in a special way not like a pet they're more than that and we think about them everyday we wonder if they know and if they know we know they know and if we show that side will they go and hide so they won't have to say "no"? sometimes we need a friend to talk to about that special friend someone to say "it's best this way" when things don't go right in the end we wonder if it's guff do they want to hear our stuff? when they say "of course that's what friends are for" have they really heard enough? sometimes we write a song to help our feelings move along if we can sing about something our feelings may not hurt so long we wonder how the fall made us feel so weak and small then it starts to seem like a silly dream and nothing hurts at all sometimes we say "good-bye" and we don't feel that we need to cry it's good to know when we let go we find we're also saying "hi"
47.
sound check 02:08
i think you and i are such a mellow melody always good together like a happy harmony like a special song that we are singing constantly now i start to see that i am driving you crazy i'm just a sound check i think we are a hit but you're treating me like i'm just a sound check you got me like a drug and then you pull the plug you are telling me you want to take a holiday so i start to talk about a lovely place to stay you look at me funny and i say are you okay now i realize that you are pushing me away i'm just a sound check i think we are a hit but you're treating me like i'm just a sound check you got me like a drug and then you pull the plug i know this song by heart you tear my heart apart when i'm rich and famous you will fall in love with me yesterday my mother said she saw me on tv i ask you if you would like to smoke some funny plants we could go out to a show and then go out to dance i get high and you say bye so then i lose my chance now one year and it is clear i won't get in your pants i'm just a sound check i think we are a hit but you're treating me like i'm just a sound check you got me like a drug and then you pull the plug i'm just a sound check i think we are a hit but you're treating me like i'm just a sound check you got me like a drug and then you pull the
48.
stop 00:03
49.
if i could live my whole life again i would not want to have you just as a friend 'cause when we dated some time i thought things were fine but you kicked me right in my rear end dink donk do you remember once you were small? yes you looked up to me 'cause i was your all but then you stabbed me one time and kicked my behind and you left me to break and to fall dink donk and i fell down down down like a big clown clown clown oh yes i fell down down down dink donk you play with me just like i'm a toy you talk to me like i'm a dumb little boy and while you're playing around i drop to the ground i feel pain when you're laughing with joy dink donk you know you said that our love was real but then you turn around and say you can't deal i wish you'd make up your mind you're deaf dumb and blind and you surely don't know how to feel dink donk and i feel down down down should i kneel down down down? oh yes i feel down down down dink donk all i can do now is sing this song it is the only way for me to go on i wish that i could just die i'm weak like a fly you're the queen and i'm less than a pawn dink donk this is the dink donk song
50.
the end 02:01
i've come to the end, my friends i'm sorry and i hope you understand i've got other stuff to do and some groupies too let's not let it ruin your weekend there's a lot of you i want to thank you paid for the beer i drank i know my songs are funny and thanks for your money i'm drinking all the way to the bank i want to thank the technical dude the lights sure sounded good and the friendly staff i'm glad i made you laugh i want to have sex with all of you now i really have to end my show i'm sorry but the answer's no if you're cute and legal age you can come backstage but you won't be the same when you go
51.
me on the train one day you wouldn't look my way but then you finally did and then you didn't look away you going through your change and you were changing trains so then we joined the cue and me and you made our exchange everything just started spinning and my number started winning like the saints all started sinning at the start of the beginning then blending with the crowd the train was hot and loud you asked me what was next and so i guess we hit the town we drank a lot of wine and it was argentine and in the tango that we danced i knew the chance was mine everything just started spinning and my number started winning like the saints all started sinning at the start of the beginning bye good luck all you songs you made me big and strong maybe someday someone will come and want to play along
52.
53.
wake up at dawn put dark clothes on still it's quite clear there's no deer here creep while we walk no one may talk still it's quite clear there's no deer here with every step no twig may snap still it's quite clear there's no deer here stay in a group look for their poop still it's quite clear there's no deer here find their hoof prints where they'd been since still it's quite clear there's no deer here search for horn marks in the tree barks still it's quite clear there's no deer here nightfall is near drink one more beer still it's quite clear there's no deer here
54.
think 00:03
a thought is a thing you think in your brain think a while and you can link your thoughts like a chain chain them all together and you'll think anything it would take forever to think everything now someone may think a very bad thought something they try not to think but they cannot not i think i can think of some so if it's okay here are some examples of some thinking today one day at a school in the art class one kid thought that he would make some art from his ass he shoved a big tube right up his rear end and shat through the tube into the ass of a friend a man was online and posted an ad eating someone's penis was the thought that he had sure enough he found a guy and cut off his pride he tried to feed it back to him but then the guy died then there was a man who needed some cash so he thought he'd enter in a bug-eating match first he ate worms, then cockroaches too just after he won he choked to death on his spew and there was a guy who was a rock star he thought if he hung himself his dick would get hard one day he was hanging from the knob of a door he had so much fun he couldn't breathe anymore the list just goes on and yes it's all true it's all on the internet for you to read through these are just examples of some people i found some end up in jail and some end up in the ground so if you have thoughts watch out where they go keep them safe inside you so that others won't know all your thoughts are locked up like a safe in your skull if you let them out your life will never be dull
55.
tonight 03:05
i'm freaking out tonight because the inside isn't doing right i'm freaking out tonight and i'm taking everything in sight you can tell the entertainers and the party masqueraders that i'm tipping all the waiters and i'm turning up the faders tonight i'm watching out tonight because so many say i don't live right i'm watching out tonight but i don't even want to start a fight you can tell the mediators and the big negotiators that i'm not a big debater and i won't be back later tonight i'm getting out tonight because my papers aren't looking right i'm getting out tonight and i'm leaving on a one way flight you can tell investigators and the mass communicators that i'm not an instigator i'm just living like a traitor tonight delegators, litigators, arbitrators, moderators, stipulators, educators, designators, postulators, inundators, calculators, generators, modulators, nominators, heads of staters, all just complicators tonight
56.
tonight i drunk so much i couldn't drunk no more i'm thanking all my angels for showing me the floor 'cause without a floor i'd be on air an astronaut with not a care i'd start to wonder what all this is for tonight i drunk so much that things are back the same her eyes, her nose, her lips that always said my name i used to think it was the drink that turned her back on me but she's back to me tonight like an old flame i told her i would never let another drink get in our way and if it asked me out to play i'd have to say "another day" i told her i would never drink until the drink was drinking me until it dragged me out to sea and let me sink in misery i told her i would never lie about the times when i was getting drunk enough to keep forgetting i was letting everything drift on by bye-bye tonight i drunk so much i never knew no pain i'd eat up that whole cake someone left out in the rain if i could sway a better way i'd have my final drink today but tonight a drink goes right straight to my vein
57.
when i had hair my memory was safe and sound up there i knew when my car last had repair ask me for directions, i knew where now all is lost from all the wear and tear back in the days when i had hair girls who knew my age still didn't care my wife was unaware of my affairs now i see a girl and i just stare i don't know if i'm wearing underwear when i had hair i danced around like i was fred astaire i did anything just on a dare but getting any action now is rare i can barely get out of a chair back in the days when i had hair i felt like a multi-millionaire with more than my fair share of fame and flair now i'm a scary nightmare all that's left to lose is all my air
58.
do you remember when you drank and you told me i will always be the one you have to thank for the memories, the kind reminders of the way you were when you drank early one morning after the bar you were still drinking and you could not find my toilet in the dark in the light of day i found my bed was wet and you had no alibi because i had no pet you had a singing gig, your band was pretty known but you said after we could leave and make some music of our own you were nowhere to be found when you were through you were in the men's room and your bass player was in you do you remember when you drank and you told me i will always be the one you have to thank for the memories, the kind reminders of the way you were when you drank we had a break-up for a little while so i was seeing other women just to have myself a smile one day you came by to fix your broken heart you proved your love by breaking my guitar then late one evening you took a little drive and you said the words that always made you feel more alive but they mean less now since you took that turn "there's always time to live and learn" do you remember when you drank and you told me i will always be the one you have to thank for the memories, the kind reminders of the way you were when you drank
59.
time just got away again i don't know how i keep missing my train maybe i don't need to be anywhere else than where i was just then i'll be just fine doing my thing everyone else can go on wandering maybe i'll sit here asking why why all the world and the sky or i can be happy that i i have the time to watch people go by animals fly, they don't ask why i forgot my way again maybe this leads me to back where i was i always fine there's something new i'll let the others keep searching because i'll be just fine doing my thing everyone else can go on wandering maybe i'll sit here asking why why all the world and the sky or i can be happy that i i have the time to watch hours go by animals fly, they don't ask why

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released October 17, 2014

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Peter D'Elia Berlin, Germany

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